tin can treader: Well look who's back in town

I'm kind of proud of my little brother. I would never say this to his face, and I'm risking quite a bit by saying it here. If he reads this, he might get a big head and it's my job to keep him in his place. I am older and far superior. That is the way of the world.

This is my brother, pre braces, with a mullet.

For the last 3-ish years he has been living in China, teaching conversational English and drinking his weight in Asian beer. We skyped for a minute yesterday, all the while I thought he was still in China. Then I talk to my dad who tells me he just got back and I could call him on his old cell number. WTF douche bag? You couldn't mention that during our little chat session? We communicate in a special way. It's dangerous for others to use mine or my husbands computers, because if skype says that we're online, there could be a message box that pops up saying "Hey F#$%er, you there?" He and my husband can go back and forth with this kind of crudeness and perversion ALL DAY. When we get on an actual Skype call with him, I always have to open with an immediate "Kids in the room! Kids in the room!".

Here's a little bit of what he sent me while he was over seas. I tried to save money so that I could fly out there for a visit, but it never happened. :(

That hat works well with your giant creepy eyes.