I've known he is in bad shape for a while now. He's so thin that the vet described as "emaciated" today. He weighed in at a mere 53 lbs. His younger weight was around 75 lbs. He eats, but not like he used to. He still loves to snatch a slice pizza right out from under the kids, but he is eating less of his dog food.
He can't stand up through an entire bath, and after I drained the tub, giving him the "ok" to take off, he just laid there. In an empty bath tub not wanting to move. Then today at the vet while waiting on his blood work to come back we took a little walk around the premises. He just fell down. Then he just laid there for about 10 minutes.
I left the vet with some pills for joint pain and a steroid. She told me we could try them out and see if he started to get around better and put on some weight. But she also made it clear that if I had to make "the difficult decision" she wouldn't discourage me and she wouldn't think it was wrong.
I spent a lot of time crying this morning. For now, we've decided that he's just going to come with us and I'll just have to help him up and down the stairs when he goes out. But is this wrong? Am I being selfish, putting him through a big move, then subjecting him to those stairs, giving him all those meds, only to prolong the inevitable? Or is it selfish to end his life because the changes in our life have highlighted his inadequacies?
We also thought we would leave him with friends until we buy a house and then come back for him. But that could be up to a year, and I am fully aware of what might (will probably) happen in that time frame. Also, the vet said that would probably be more traumatic for him than good.
I still feel like he has life left in him, but I still see the dog in all these pictures. Not the withered away skeletal frame that others are seeing. I can't make this decision.